That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
