Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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