Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
