He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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