I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
