"it" just moved
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
