Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
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