Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
he was CRYING into my vagina
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Just pee around me
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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