another moral hangover. fuck.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Randomize
