omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Randomize
