when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Randomize
