I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
