Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
