Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
