just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
