Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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