goodnight i made you a song goodbye
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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