I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Also, beer. Big fan.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
