I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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