belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Randomize
