Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
