he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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