he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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