did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
