Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
