Christians are straight up FREAKS
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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