yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Holy shit dude........stairs
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
