I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
