I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
