doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
