wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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