His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
