Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
