Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
