NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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