help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
