YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Randomize
