If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
