escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
