Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
