he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
