i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
