My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
My pussy is not your playground.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Randomize
