hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
