i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
The uberlube is also flammable
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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