Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize