It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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