it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
