how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
