no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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