Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
